05/15/10 @ 9:16AM EST
posted by will

The thrilling conclusion to my Five Guys Challenge!

Here it is, a picture of me eating a 13 patty cheeseburger. This was took about 40 minutes to finish, the last 15 minutes being the last 3 bites. That's how I knew that it was the maximum. I'm not going to buy 14 to confirm this, as I don't want to pay $30 to validate my failure. It was a good run. (But probably not for my body.) (Just kidding, I'm immortal.)

Everything was going as planned, increasing by one patty per week, when the Five Guys people said the best they could find confirmed was someone ordering a 12 patty burger. My wallet was beginning to get annoyed with this challenge, so I decided to go for the gusto, and just jump from 9 to 13.

That next week they had pictures of a 21 patty burger that they found, and there's really no hope for me then. Sorry guys, I'm not quite that impressive. Initially I decided I would try it; the next week I would get 17, then plan from there. That plan quickly disappeared as I ate the burger.

I'm pretty proud of myself, it was fun, and this makes an excellent profile picture now. Stay tuned for my next exciting food challenge later this summer. (Ooo, cliffhanger!)

Dearest arteries,
Sorry about this challenge.
Signed, Immortal Will.

Godspeed.

[Tags: food]